Time Out

The time has come to really start the discipline phase of parenting. Should I have started a bit sooner? Maybe but I have to do what is best for Maddy. About a week or two ago I started using the word time out more often. Up until today she has always chosen to straighten up her attitude, instead of going to time out. Tonight she was definitely in a testing mood so for the first time ever she had a time out. She threw herself down on her bed and just boo hooed. Once she started saying, "Get up!" I explained what she had to do in order to get up. She said ok through her tears and then I counted to 20. The minute time out was done she got up and then burst into tears all over again. I asked her why she was crying and she just looked at me and stopped. She finally said, "Cry in there". I have her a hug and for the rest of the night there were no more fits or testings. I'm so thankful she responds to time outs because I don't really believe in spanking. I don't think spanking is wrong, it's just not best for Maddy and me. She seems to be like me and just knowing she did something wrong upsets her.

Valentine's Day 2012

What I had planned for today was nothing like how today actually went. It started last night when Maddy was waking up crying every five minutes. I had plans of getting up early to make her a special breakfast that consisted of:

I was looking for the paper muffin holder thingys (lovely English huh?) when Maddy's bad night started. I finally realized there would be no going to the store last night because Maddy was having some kind of problem. I finally decided that if all else failed I could still make the muffins without the holders so I decided to put the muffin making aside and comfort Maddy. I would love to know what happened because it wasn't just a small cry, her pillow and covers were soaked from her tears. I went through a list of questions and everything was yes. As long as I was sitting up with her laying on me she would sleep. I decided to try one more time leaving her room but within five to ten minutes she was crying all over again. I grabbed my blanket and camped out in her room. It was a pretty long night up until we both got to sleep, then morning came way too early. I realized there would be no muffin making because if I got up, she would have woke up. I made a new plan of giving her cinnamon bread in the shape of a heart. We woke up on time and when it came to getting dressed I realized we had a problem. I have had her valentine outfit for a while now. I hung her shirt up, but apparently I laid her pants elsewhere. I could have sworn I put them in her pack n play (that is my catch all in her room for now), but after pulling everything out I did not find any pants. I searched and searched for her pants and they were just not appearing. I finally decided to just get her diaper changed and her shirt on then while she ate breakfast I could go back to looking. By the time she started breakfast it was already 7:50 a.m. and mind you we need to be walking out the door by 8:00 a.m. When she got in her highchair she immediately asked for her surprise because last night I went on and on about a surprise in the morning, which was supposed to be the muffins. Thank goodness i had her valentine's gift ready so I went ahead and gave it to her. Here is the video of her opening her present/gift:

While she worked on her chocolate I tried to find our heart cookie cutter...yeah...I couldn't. I attempted to cut a heart freestyle with a knife out of her bread and it actually turned out pretty good, but she wasn't interested in it due to her having had chocolate. I did some more searching for her pants and finally realized I needed to just grab some pants that matched. I walked back in the kitchen and it was 8:14 a.m. I threw her pants on, picked her up, ran to the car and got her buckled in. I was about to pull out when I realized I left her shoes sitting on the couch. Back in park I go and I run back in to grab her shoes and her coat. I got in the car only to remember her nails are super sharp and needed cutting, otherwise I would have a note sent home telling me to cut her nails, so back in the house I go to get the clippers. I get back in the car and it's 8:20. It takes 45 minutes to get to daycare and they are supposed to be there by 9:00 a.m. Of coarse the one day I am really late is the day I get behind every slow driver in the world...I mean they weren't even doing the speed limit. I pull in daycare at 8:57. Run to the back, cut Maddy's nails, put her shoes on her, pick her up and grabbed the rest of the stuff and we took off running...I'm sure I looked pretty ridiculous lol. I signed her in at 9:02 and I felt as if the day should have been over. Maddy is having some real bad seperation anxiety lately and will not let me leave unless her teacher takes her from me. This morning was no exception. I realized when I got in the car (after somehow closing my knee in the door which left me in tears due to the pain) that this day was not going to go at all like I had planned. I still have no idea where her pants are, but I'm sure I will find them tomorrow lol. The end of the day turned out pretty good. Maddy seemed to really enjoy the day and she knows it involves hearts and chocolates. 

Sunday night I stayed up till 1:00 a.m. trying to get Maddy's valentine's day box wrapped to where she could decorate it. I bought these cute heart shaped foam stickers for her to decorate with:

I forgot to take a pic of the box itself (I was a little disappointed in MY job in wrapping the box, but of coarse I LOVED Maddy's decorating skills) but I did get a pic of it today that I will share. The rest of the pics are from today...from my phone and my camera. The skirt was part of her outfit, however, they have bloomers attached to them and in order to wear them today she would have needed tights and that is just too much to deal with at school when they are potty training so I ended up putting her in khaki pants that were too short lol. Yeah, I was a little embarrassed over that one but it happens to every mom :)

 I had no intentions of posting this, but after the way the day started I thought this is a good representation of how I felt...like screaming lol. We were being silly and just going ahhhh like you would at the doctor or something like that.

I got a nice surprise from my step dad. We aren't really close, but he got me this rose to let me know he was proud of me and that made me feel good :)

Yes, I look a little awkward in this pic lol...I was taking the pic and was in an awkward angle with my hand and I wasn't even sure we were both in the pic...we both were and I just decided to go with this one cause it was too much work to try to get a better one. As you can see Maddy has had her share of chocolate for the day and she is sleeping peacefully as I write. I hope you all had a wonderful day!! Happy Valentine's Day!!

Here's To Hoping

As you all know I have been dealing with some things that I don't feel is the right time to share...mainly because there isn't anything happening that is definite, just gut feelings. I have also felt as if it just isn't the right time and I don't want to say anything until I know the time is right. Me and Maddy met up with one of my friends this weekend and her son who is only 3 months older than Maddy. I used to say her son and Maddy had to marry each other because I would love to officially make her my family, but we haven't really been able to stay close. I enjoyed meeting up with her and catching up but I also left feeling slapped in the face. I can't help but wonder what God's reasoning for us meeting up is/was. This post goes hand in hand with my everything happens for a reason post. I know that God didn't have us meet for me to get hurt and now I am having a hard time focusing on things I really can't afford to lose. I don't know if I am giving up or if there's something more to how I feel. Last time I felt like I do right now I ended up being right...I went into labor with Maddy unexpectedly. I'm hoping something is in the works right around the corner and my temporary misery can be stopped, but I also have to realize that what I think might be fixing to happen may not. This week in particular I am having a rough time keeping up the fight and that scares me. As someone recently pointed out to me I am not a quitter. I try to give my all in everything I do, but right now I am failing that. I know this post may not entirely make sense to people, but it makes perfect sense to me lol. I really do hope that I can come back one day and tie all these posts together and explain more about what I am talking about. Right now I just need to let some of my feelings out so I can go about my business until more feelings get bottled up. I just feel different this week...moreso than any other week and in one sense it excites me because I am thinking that maybe something good is right around the corner, but it also scares me because it might not be...I just may be giving up the fight. Time will tell. Maddy is having a rough night and I told her I would be back so I better go check on her and get her Valentine's day present ready. That post will be tomorrow or if I am up tonight I will go ahead and post tonight when I get done :) 

Everything Happens For A Reason...

We are only in the second month of the year and I already feel like I've had so many hurdles to jump. Last year was a pretty amazing year, but this year has just been one big battle. When I get hit with hard times I definitely stop and pray and then I carry on through music. I love The Preacher's Wife Soundtrack and tonight is no exception. My favorite song is Hold On, Help Is On the Way but I already posted that video so I will post a different video that is a little more fitting for this post:

I definitely feel like I am on a long journey. I have been dealing with burdens for a while now, but today has been super hard on me. When I initially heard the news I definitely shed a few tears right then and there, but was able to gain my composure again. Afterwards I did what most kids would do and called up my mom to basically say life isn't fair lol. I know everything happens for a reason and nine times out of ten we don't understand the why's right then and there. I have recently taken a look back at my life and thought about all the things I had prayed for in the past and how what I wanted for the most part didn't happen. I now look back and I can honestly say I am so happy those things did not happen. Everything turned out just fine in the end and I ended up even happier in life. I keep telling myself that eventually this storm will eventually blow over and I will be able to take a look back and say, "Whew!" I honestly don't know what's in the Lord's plans for me and Maddy but I do know He has one. I know that He is in control and there is NOTHING impossible to Him. I know that He has provided for Maddy and me thus far and He will continue to do so from here on out. I do know that EVERYTHING works together for the good and I have seen that proven true. I know what I want to happen in my life, but the question is...is it what He wants? I do know that when we call on Him, He will be there...may not come when we want but He's always on time...I will end with my favorite song :)

Ok I gotta post one more...I mean can't leave out a great song can we?

Skating

We recently celebrated my oldest niece's 10th birthday and she wanted to take some of her friends skating. We did cake/ice cream and presents at my sister's house, then headed down to the skating rink for some good times. I must say I have never felt old in my life...I actually still feel really young despite the fact that I turn 29 this year. I have also never really felt un cool in a parent kind of way. All that changed with one night out with my niece, her friends, and the rest of the skating rink. I used to skate as a teenager at this rink and I remember feeling so cool and yes I thought my mom was so uncool lol...that night I just felt really out of place and old! Anyways, when we were getting skates I asked if they had Maddy's size available and the guy didn't even go look he just said, "No I don't think so." I ended up going ahead and getting my skates. I never thought Maddy would feel scared, but I looked down and she just has pure fear in her eyes and was real clingy. I hugged her and tried to reassure her and she slowly started to become more and more comfortable. My sister held her for me while I took one lap around the rink. Might I add that if you don't skate in oh...11-12 years it is definitely a little difficult to get used to again lol. I'm sure all the younger kids were laughing at me but it was still really fun. I got the bright idea to just grab my youngest niece's skates (she refused to try skating) to use for Maddy because in the end it wouldn't matter since Maddy would not be skating on her own. I'm so glad I did cause we got some pictures and she actually did very well. She started to be silly and would say, "Woah, whoa..." We all had a great time and I can't wait to take Maddy back!

Pump It Up

I've been MIA from the blog world for a little while. Not real sure when I will come back as my schedule has changed quite a bit. I had to share Maddy's first "friend" birthday party. One of my high school friends invited me and Maddy to her daughter's 3rd birthday at a place called pump it up. I was extremely nervous because I hadn't seen her since high school and I wouldn't really know the people there...I'm a very shy person lol. We got there and even Maddy was playing shy, but she warmed up pretty quick once she got to play. I am amazed at what all she can do all by herself. She was climbing like a pro by the time we were done. Before I post the pictures I will say that without a doubt it was so much fun and I'm really glad we were able to attend. I think I had as much fun as Maddy did and I am so ready to go back! With the pictures I will have to be very selective because I do not want to post other kids' pictures without permission so I may not have many or any pics at all for that matter lol...

I got a lot of pictures! This is proof she really does smile because in most of her pics she looks so seirous lol. She really had a great time!

Stand Up!

If you're on my Facebook, you know Maddy is really into VeggieTales. We recently got a new cd for the car and this song caught my attention. Before we can stand up for what we believe in, we have to know what it is we do believe in. Standing up for a belief is no easy task, but as the song says God will stand by you and He will back you up.