Gilmore Girls

This past week I pulled out my Gilmore Girls dvd that brought up a lot of memories. I was first introduced to the Gilmore Girls when I was in high school by a fellow orchestra member. I remember watching the show soon after he told me and my mom and I was hooked ever since. How Lorelai and Rory behave is very similar to who I really am. Most people don't know who I really am because I am very shy and quiet. My mom became a single mom toward the end of my seventh grade year. We were just like Lorelai and Rory on the Gilmore Girls...almost to a tee. For those who don't watch the show, or didn't should I say, Lorelai was also a single mom and was from the time Rory was born up until she graduated college. Lorelai did date and even got married, but ended up divorced soon after. When my mom started dating I struggled greatly and did not handle it well at all. Then came the day she told me she was getting married...we won't even talk about my emotions on THAT day. Bottom line is it can be rough on kids when their mom or dad start dating or even marry someone other than their real mom or dad. I have always said I will be sensitive to my child's feelings on this subject because their opinion and feelings are extremely important on such a big decision. Here I am today, a single mom to my beautiful Maddy. I said throughout my pregnancy that I would never date because I didn't want Maddy to get hurt in any way. I picture me and Maddy being like my mom and I were and of coarse how Lorelai and Rory were. Over the past two years I have had a few offers that would put me back in the dating scene, but I always blew them off. Recently I was given an opportunity that could potentially jump start the dating scene for me. I had to think long and hard about it and to be honest I don't quite know how I feel about dating just yet. I realized that I tend to seclude myself from people and would really like to change that. I do hope me and Maddy can have a Lorelai and Rory type of relationship, but I still need to have my own life for when she grows up on me and is ready to conquer the world. I've decided to have a more open mind on the whole dating thing and will push myself to at least try when the opportunity arises, instead of automatically saying no. Maddy will always be my number one priority and I will not have men come in and out of her life. As she gets older I will listen to how she feels and hopefully we can find a compromise. Lorelai was very protective of Rory when it came to her dating life and that's how I plan to be with Maddy. I hope once Maddy graduates college people in our life can say the exact same thing that Lorelai's dad told her on the final episode...basically...she was an amazing person and she deserved to have a "proper" goodbye party for the daughter she did such a good job raising. I would love to live in a little town like Stars Hollow where everybody knows each other, but that is not our world. I have made plenty of mistakes with Maddy already in the short two years she has been alive...I'm not perfect, but I am proud of the accomplishments we have achieved and am proud of the person she is becoming. I hope to someday find my "Luke" but for now I am really enjoying being single and just focusing on Maddy. I love my life as a mom and I am so thankful I wouldn't rather be out partying or out with friends like some parents these days wish...I love taking Maddy with me everywhere and the time we spend. I firmly believe in being a good example for her and I will only do things she can do as well. One thing we have started doing is have family dinners in the evening where we all sit at the table, pray for our food, then dig in. Maddy loves to say the prayer and it just makes my heart so happy. I think she was unsure of the whole family dinner thing on the first night, but she learned quickly and now she just follows the routine. I take the opportunity to work on table manners with her and I think we are at least making small progressions lol. That is pretty much the end of my Gilmore Girl ramblings for tonight.